Lesson Plans
We can make them think gooder, get stonger, we can build them up in order to break them back down. But above all, we care about your child’s schooling costs, and would hate to see a child left outside again.
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Newborns (0mo - 6mo)
Your child will receive some attention, as well as your desired food preference. For children who are typically chest-fed at home, HGH-laced formula replacements are procured from the nearest slaughterhouse to ensure adequate growth.
Your child will receive some attention, as well as your desired food preference. For children who are typically chest-fed at home, HGH-laced formula replacements are procured from the nearest slaughterhouse to ensure adequate growth.
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Infants (6mo-1y)
As your child learns to grasp objects and voice disapproval, we will ensure that any objects disapproved of will be tolerated as we begin to work on stretching their skull in order to fit a much larger and more potent brain!
As your child learns to grasp objects and voice disapproval, we will ensure that any objects disapproved of will be tolerated as we begin to work on stretching their skull in order to fit a much larger and more potent brain!
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Toddler I (Age 1 - 2)
Your child will learn how to hold, grasp, bash, and speak, in our all-encompassing and homely Toddler I program!
Your child will learn how to hold, grasp, bash, and speak, in our all-encompassing and homely Toddler I program!
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Toddler 2 (Age 2 - 3)
Here, your child will begin exploring the world, experiencing their first pains of life, while ensuring resilience can be built through shared childhood experiences
Here, your child will begin exploring the world, experiencing their first pains of life, while ensuring resilience can be built through shared childhood experiences
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Here, your child will get ready for their first day in big-kids school!
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Pre-School II (Age 4-16)
If your child is unable to meet the typical milestones required for public schooling, Pre-School II is here to make sure they’re at least able to withstand the persistent bullying seen in our public school system!
If your child is unable to meet the typical milestones required for public schooling, Pre-School II is here to make sure they’re at least able to withstand the persistent bullying seen in our public school system!
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FAQs
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Yes.
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We use AI to determine how much money you’re able to spend on child-care costs, and round up from there :)
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Everything, so we’ll start with reading, writing, and playing unsupervised.
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Due to constant construction and the replacement of water mains across the city, parents and visitors must park in the neighboring building’s parking lot, directly across highway 13 (and 27). The walk is approximately 0.8mi